Someone sent me a generic forward recently showing kids in Africa, (I assume) living is sub-standard living conditions. The caption on the e-mail said, "Thankful" or something like that. Then the persoanl message was, "This is real life sweetie!" Well truly for these kids, it is their real life and for the rest of us it would be a hellish nightmare. The idea of course is to remind us how lucky we are to live in a first world country and have all the luxuries that 3/4 of the world does not have. Well I can say that although there are days I forget, I know that most of the time I am truly grateful for what I have. I realize that even on the small salary my husband makes we have more than many people in this world and one does not need to go to a third world country to find children living in abject poverty, barely surviving. I know people who survived childhood by sleeping in abandoned tunnels in Israel, I know people who survived childhood by sleeping cars in America and I grew up with people who survived childhood despite their parents drug abuse.
However, I don't think things have to be a worst case scenario to be real. The life that each one of us leads is very real to us and it is not for another person to say whether or not that life is real. I have friends that recently moved back to Israel after being gone for six years. They have gotten many comments such as, "oh you are Israeli, it is so easy for you." Or "Everyone has stress, you just have to deal." It has made their adjustment that much more difficult. For one this is a country that reinvents itself every 7 years and for another, things simply change in that much time. I feel it is unfair to belittle someone's stress simply because it is not seen as crucial as say the child with no bed in Africa.
Whether a person's life seems real to one person is irrelevant because to the person living it, it is very real. But more importantly, shouldn't we be grateful for the opportunity we have, that we can evaluate ourselves and figure out how to improve ourselves and our lives. I think the bigger loss would be to say, "well I am doing better than some kid in Africa, guess I don't have to work to achieve anything else." What a waste of the opportunities and resources we have if we do not take advantage of them. Because my children have food and a warm place to sleep every night, it means I have more time to figure out how to be a better parent and how to give them a better education. If I did not evaluate these things and stopped at the fact that they are well fed and clothed, I would be doing them a disservice.
As for me, what is "Real Life?" "Real Life" is when I look at my 3 kids and see them playing together even though I have a 3 year old and 6mo. old twins. "Real Life," is when I realize I am married to someone who believes with all his heart that he is doing the right thing for his family. And when I realize that my children will grow up bi-lingual with out giving it another thought. If anyone has seen the movie, "The Family Man" with Nicholas Cage, he goes from being a single corporate exec. to a father with 2 kids living in the New Jersey burbs overnight. This happens of course through Christmas Magic to teach him a lesson. But I can really relate. As sometimes, I stop what I am doing look at my family when I see them all crowded into our bed on a Satuday morning and wonder, "when did this happen!?" and I think this is "Real Life" for me.
This winter I hope to push my self to learn better hebrew, or else I am not taking advantage of the oppportunity I have living in a foreign country. I hope to push my self to learn more Torah or I am wasting my time living in the birth place of Judaism. I want to push my self to learn more and to be more so that my children will learn by example and do the same. So that we do not waste the opportunities that our "Real Life" has given us.
Shavua Tov,
Have a great week!
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Monday, November 13, 2006
A Ripple in the Water......
September 24th began Rosh Hashanna and the Jewish new year. For all Jews and Israelis this is our time of new year resolutions, reflections on the past and the promise that we will try to kick those old nasty habits we have been carrying about for longer than we care to admit. And for the secular world those resolutions will come out Dec. 31 at midnight on the eve the secular new year. So it is no wonder that it seems I and my friends have been doing a lot of soul searching as of late. Because lets face it, another year is staring us in the face and we just aren't getting any younger!
In this quest I had a friend who asked the interesting question of, " what do you want your obituary to read?" This may seem a bit morbid to some, but I think it helps define who a person really wants to be and their priorities when all is said and done. Her response was, "that i tried my best to help people and something in the world is now better than it had been." It is a wonderful statement and I know that having been her friend for a very long time now, almost 14 years, her goal has been accomplished.
I think we go through life never really understanding the effect we have on other people. Recently I had the privilege of being involved in a ripple effect where my role was so minor that I could not possibly know how large the ripple would go until, someone wrote a story and published it in the NY Times. Here is the link:
In this quest I had a friend who asked the interesting question of, " what do you want your obituary to read?" This may seem a bit morbid to some, but I think it helps define who a person really wants to be and their priorities when all is said and done. Her response was, "that i tried my best to help people and something in the world is now better than it had been." It is a wonderful statement and I know that having been her friend for a very long time now, almost 14 years, her goal has been accomplished.
I think we go through life never really understanding the effect we have on other people. Recently I had the privilege of being involved in a ripple effect where my role was so minor that I could not possibly know how large the ripple would go until, someone wrote a story and published it in the NY Times. Here is the link:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/05/fashion/05love.html?_r=1&ref=fashion&oref=slogin
It is a bit humbling to see how my actions directly affected someone else, it is
reminder that what we do is not always the end of the story, for better or for worse.
That I should be more aware of what I am doing and saying since I have no way of knowing
the true affect of my actions on someonelse outside my field of view.
As for me, at this point I am trying to re-define my goals. With 3 kids in tow, I have found that what
I thought is important is not, but part of me is having a hard time getting rid of those old tapes.
The ones that try to convince me something in my life is missing, because I didn't accomplish what I
originally set out to do. But on the other hand, if someone were to ask me if that is what I wanted now,
I could easily say, "No!"So why is my brain at war with its self, old tapes are hard to erase, they
stick around no matter how much new stuff we cram in there that we know is better. I am hoping that
by re-evaluating my self and setting new goals, eventually those old tapes will go away and I will be
able to give my full concentration to the new things I want to do.
I would be curious to know what other people have as their goals in life and what they would like their
obituary to read. If anyone wants to respond, I look forward to reading your answers. As for me I guess
I am still working on both those questions and as soon as I know I will post it here.
Have a good week!
Alina
PS pardon the typos, I am not wearing my glasses!
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Jensen parents to the principal's office please.....
Sighhh......yes it would seem that even at the tender age of 2&3/4 my kid is requiring a parent/teacher conference. Ugggghhhhh. The biggest problem is that I don't speak hebrew so the Gannenet cannot convey her concerns directly to me. In fact when the Gannenet explained about the meeting, I thought it was a field trip, because I was handed a permission slip at the same time and was told to have him there by 8:30am. Turns out it was two different things. I had my neighbor, whose son is in gan next door sort the whole thing out for me. My neighbor assures me that I should not worry and that most of her kids have had this kind of meeting. The biggest concerns for the gannenent apparantly are that, he doesn't sit still, he plays more on his own then with the rest of the kids and that his verbal skills, hebrew or english don't measure up. So at the meeting will the head of the early education dept. who be able to discuss the issues and see if anything needs to be done. Possibilities could include, guiding the gannenent on how to work with him, having me work with him or sending him for outside help. I can't believe the gannenet has never had a child with any of these issues, so I will be curious to see what happens. Although neighbor says that the advice is usually very helpful and if there is something why not stop it now, I worry that this going to be the start of a long line of, "Mrs. Jensen, your child does not fit in the box." Well I knew that on the day he was born and he was trying to hold his head up and see what was going on. Not to mention we had him at home too. But I am going to go with an open mind and hope for the best. I guess it will be an insight to the Israeli mentality of the school system here and what is expected. And if it really will help him in the future, then I am happy to do it.
On to other news. Since it has been a month since my last up date I will give a quick re-cap of what we have been doing. Rosh Hashanna began on Sept. 23 and was really nice. We ate most of our meals out and had a great time. Yom Kippur was long as usual and I must say that although some things grabbed at me this year, I did not have a strong spiritual connection during Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippur. I think it is hard to focus on the deeper meaning of things when chasing 3 kids. My biggest concerns were making sure that everyone was taken care of. Although they do have a day care during the services I could not just leave the twins as they were nursing and I had to be near by and I was not sure how S would do. In the end he did OK mostly. Sukkot was great. We splurged and bought a new Sukkah. Here in Israel they have really nice pre-fab Sukkahs and we bought one. The Jensens go wild and decide be conformists like everyone else. And can I tell you, it was nice. It was a lot like one of the American outdoor screen tents. And what was even better, I did not have to help put it up! One of the neighbor kids helped us and all I had to do was make dinner. Yeah! For the first days we had friends from Raanana that we knew in Portland come. The C family. They came last year so it is becoming a nice tradition. They have 3 boys, 5, 3.5 and 5.5mo. S had a great time playing with the two older ones and it was fun having all the babies in the house. Sukkot is 7 days long and at the end is Simchat Torah/Shmeni Aretz. So for the middle week between sukkot chag and sim chat torah is vacation time for almost the whole country. Think labor day, memorial day, etc. for a whole week. So Tues. we met the C family and another family and went to the Mediteranean. I must say that there is nothing quite like living 45min. from the Med. It warm, gorgeous and truly exotic. I really need to make a point of taking the kids more. I do love the beach. I really miss the Oregon Coast somedays, so being near the Med. really makes up for it! The rest of the week was spent hanging out at home. But we got to spend it in the Sukkah which was great. This allowed me somewhere to hang out so that S could run up and down the lane in front of our house and I could keep an eye on him. Otherwise there is usually no where comfortable to sit and I either have to take him to the park or he his confined in doors. The last night of Sukkot we slept in the sukkah. Traditionaly the guys sleep there all week long, but D was not up to it so we all camped out the last night. S thought it was the best thing since sliced bread! Put one twin in a laundry basket and the other in a bassinet and everyone slept great. Unless you count that Y was up every hour on the half hour! Reminds us that we need to figure out how to take the kids camping next spring even though we don't have a car. It really made me miss camping. So I guess in the end Sukkot really reminded me that I miss the outdoors and that I need to make more of a point of taking my kids to do those types of things.
So now the holidays are over and D goes back to Kollel next week, but we have a really nice break. However, we now have friends in for their daughters wedding and we are looking forward to that. We are friends with the extended family also, who live in Portland and most of the kids from both families so we are quite excited to have everyone here visiting.
For shabbat we are out Beit Shemesh as we just had friends from Portland move back to Israel after being gone 6 years. We knew them in Portland. They have been here 2 mo. and this will be our first chance to see them. Really looking foward to catching up. They were really instrumental in us becoming religiously observant.
On the 29th my in-laws arrive and I am looking forward to the extra hands. I have been spoiled having D around for three weeks to help out. So it is nice to know help is right around the corner again!
So that will keep us busy until about mid-november. Will be nice to see so many familiar faces.
The biggest twin up date is that I started them on bottles last week. Not all day, but part of the day. It really helps. I just am not eating and drinking enough to keep up. They are happy and I am happy and less ttressed and they still get plenty of nursing time too. M is the big bottle drinker and she gets 1-2 a day and Y does maybe half a bottle. We did go to Jerusalem the other day and both got mostly bottle. It was a big help. I will start trying them out on food soon. We tried sorbet on them, but they did not quite seem ready for food yet. Maybe in another week.
OK gotta get S from Gan!
Look forward to hearing from everyone,
Alina
On to other news. Since it has been a month since my last up date I will give a quick re-cap of what we have been doing. Rosh Hashanna began on Sept. 23 and was really nice. We ate most of our meals out and had a great time. Yom Kippur was long as usual and I must say that although some things grabbed at me this year, I did not have a strong spiritual connection during Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippur. I think it is hard to focus on the deeper meaning of things when chasing 3 kids. My biggest concerns were making sure that everyone was taken care of. Although they do have a day care during the services I could not just leave the twins as they were nursing and I had to be near by and I was not sure how S would do. In the end he did OK mostly. Sukkot was great. We splurged and bought a new Sukkah. Here in Israel they have really nice pre-fab Sukkahs and we bought one. The Jensens go wild and decide be conformists like everyone else. And can I tell you, it was nice. It was a lot like one of the American outdoor screen tents. And what was even better, I did not have to help put it up! One of the neighbor kids helped us and all I had to do was make dinner. Yeah! For the first days we had friends from Raanana that we knew in Portland come. The C family. They came last year so it is becoming a nice tradition. They have 3 boys, 5, 3.5 and 5.5mo. S had a great time playing with the two older ones and it was fun having all the babies in the house. Sukkot is 7 days long and at the end is Simchat Torah/Shmeni Aretz. So for the middle week between sukkot chag and sim chat torah is vacation time for almost the whole country. Think labor day, memorial day, etc. for a whole week. So Tues. we met the C family and another family and went to the Mediteranean. I must say that there is nothing quite like living 45min. from the Med. It warm, gorgeous and truly exotic. I really need to make a point of taking the kids more. I do love the beach. I really miss the Oregon Coast somedays, so being near the Med. really makes up for it! The rest of the week was spent hanging out at home. But we got to spend it in the Sukkah which was great. This allowed me somewhere to hang out so that S could run up and down the lane in front of our house and I could keep an eye on him. Otherwise there is usually no where comfortable to sit and I either have to take him to the park or he his confined in doors. The last night of Sukkot we slept in the sukkah. Traditionaly the guys sleep there all week long, but D was not up to it so we all camped out the last night. S thought it was the best thing since sliced bread! Put one twin in a laundry basket and the other in a bassinet and everyone slept great. Unless you count that Y was up every hour on the half hour! Reminds us that we need to figure out how to take the kids camping next spring even though we don't have a car. It really made me miss camping. So I guess in the end Sukkot really reminded me that I miss the outdoors and that I need to make more of a point of taking my kids to do those types of things.
So now the holidays are over and D goes back to Kollel next week, but we have a really nice break. However, we now have friends in for their daughters wedding and we are looking forward to that. We are friends with the extended family also, who live in Portland and most of the kids from both families so we are quite excited to have everyone here visiting.
For shabbat we are out Beit Shemesh as we just had friends from Portland move back to Israel after being gone 6 years. We knew them in Portland. They have been here 2 mo. and this will be our first chance to see them. Really looking foward to catching up. They were really instrumental in us becoming religiously observant.
On the 29th my in-laws arrive and I am looking forward to the extra hands. I have been spoiled having D around for three weeks to help out. So it is nice to know help is right around the corner again!
So that will keep us busy until about mid-november. Will be nice to see so many familiar faces.
The biggest twin up date is that I started them on bottles last week. Not all day, but part of the day. It really helps. I just am not eating and drinking enough to keep up. They are happy and I am happy and less ttressed and they still get plenty of nursing time too. M is the big bottle drinker and she gets 1-2 a day and Y does maybe half a bottle. We did go to Jerusalem the other day and both got mostly bottle. It was a big help. I will start trying them out on food soon. We tried sorbet on them, but they did not quite seem ready for food yet. Maybe in another week.
OK gotta get S from Gan!
Look forward to hearing from everyone,
Alina
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Progress......
Today I realized that we are making progress in the parenting scheme of things. For the 3rd day in a row S went to Gan very nicely. Hurray! I can now quit feeling guilty.....at least about this one thing for now. I think he even likes it there, today he talked about all the friends he played with and that makes me feel really good.
The twins are also making progress. I realized that on Friday they will be 4mo. old and that they are on their way to bigger and better things. They are actually grabbing things, no thanks to mommy's help. I actually had friends both yesterday and today hand them something and they took it! At least for a few minutes. Y is much more into grabbing things, but what he really likes to grab are his hands. M is still more interested in watching than doing. However, she is more active in trying to sit up then Y is. Also if M is on her back and wants up she will push up, like when a person lays on the floor and then pushes up into a back bend. In that area Y is much more passive and is content to hang out. But they both wiggle a lot and I have to watch out as they have both launched themselves out of places I thought they were safe! I am also buckling them into the stroller these days or they will squirm right out! At this point I think M will be more active and Y more passive, but it is hard to say as both can be very active. But I have noticed that at least at this point Y is a morning person and M is a night person. It takes much longer to get M down at night and Y will wake up in the morning and just be content to hang out. He does not really want to nurse a lot, he just wants to hang out.
In some ways, I feel I have made progress too. I feel I am more tuned into my kids needs now. I don't feel I was always as tuned into what S wanted and needed. That was hard. I knew the basics, but I feel now I am more aware. It doesn't always mean I am good at acting on it, but it helps out. With the twins I feel I am really tuned in. I don't know if it because I have to be or I have more time to be or if it is just because after having 3 kids I have learned a few things! Of course it also helps that twins are getting older and even at 4 mo. it makes a difference from when they were newborns.
In other progressing news, my hebrew is coming along. We had another session Tuesday and we not only covered banking but basic words like, shirt, shoes, potty chair, etc. I am excited to be studying and I hope some of it sticks. But I am also excited to just get out and have somewhere to go a couple of days a week. I like having adult conversation and being out of my house and because my study partner is sometimes house bound because of health issues, she likes the company too. It is a good time for both of us. Her kids are home schooled so we get lots of extra help with babies too. But I really like having somewhere to go and some one to meet with. Although we have a lot of friends here, I have few people I can call on just to go over and hang out. Usually we see people at functions or just for shabbat meals. So it is nice having that kind of relationship with someone here. I do have a couple of other friends like that, but they are usually busy during the day since all their kids are in Gan or grade school so that is hard. It is one of the things I need to work on here. But those thoughts will have to wait another day. But I am making progress!
Shana Tova (Happy New Year!)
The twins are also making progress. I realized that on Friday they will be 4mo. old and that they are on their way to bigger and better things. They are actually grabbing things, no thanks to mommy's help. I actually had friends both yesterday and today hand them something and they took it! At least for a few minutes. Y is much more into grabbing things, but what he really likes to grab are his hands. M is still more interested in watching than doing. However, she is more active in trying to sit up then Y is. Also if M is on her back and wants up she will push up, like when a person lays on the floor and then pushes up into a back bend. In that area Y is much more passive and is content to hang out. But they both wiggle a lot and I have to watch out as they have both launched themselves out of places I thought they were safe! I am also buckling them into the stroller these days or they will squirm right out! At this point I think M will be more active and Y more passive, but it is hard to say as both can be very active. But I have noticed that at least at this point Y is a morning person and M is a night person. It takes much longer to get M down at night and Y will wake up in the morning and just be content to hang out. He does not really want to nurse a lot, he just wants to hang out.
In some ways, I feel I have made progress too. I feel I am more tuned into my kids needs now. I don't feel I was always as tuned into what S wanted and needed. That was hard. I knew the basics, but I feel now I am more aware. It doesn't always mean I am good at acting on it, but it helps out. With the twins I feel I am really tuned in. I don't know if it because I have to be or I have more time to be or if it is just because after having 3 kids I have learned a few things! Of course it also helps that twins are getting older and even at 4 mo. it makes a difference from when they were newborns.
In other progressing news, my hebrew is coming along. We had another session Tuesday and we not only covered banking but basic words like, shirt, shoes, potty chair, etc. I am excited to be studying and I hope some of it sticks. But I am also excited to just get out and have somewhere to go a couple of days a week. I like having adult conversation and being out of my house and because my study partner is sometimes house bound because of health issues, she likes the company too. It is a good time for both of us. Her kids are home schooled so we get lots of extra help with babies too. But I really like having somewhere to go and some one to meet with. Although we have a lot of friends here, I have few people I can call on just to go over and hang out. Usually we see people at functions or just for shabbat meals. So it is nice having that kind of relationship with someone here. I do have a couple of other friends like that, but they are usually busy during the day since all their kids are in Gan or grade school so that is hard. It is one of the things I need to work on here. But those thoughts will have to wait another day. But I am making progress!
Shana Tova (Happy New Year!)
Monday, September 18, 2006
Success!
Shmuely finaly went to Gan today without so much as a complaint! I an not sure what did it. However, it seemed to make all the difference that I told him I am going to my hebrew study group today, just like he is learning hebrew in Gan. Maybe he felt that was a worthy cause to be left at Gan, or maybe he feels we are in the same boat. I am not sure. However, I am very grateful because I was up all last night with Y because he was running a fever. I think it is from his teeth. But at any rate he was up apporximately every two hours last night. To say the least, mommy was a bit fried this morning!
As for the study group I am learning hebrew with a friend from the neighborhood. Today we mostly spent visiting and playing with the twins, but we went through our collective materials and went over some vocabulary relating to banking. Very useful. Tomorrow we will be focusing more on the hebrew and will be going over the banking end of things.
I am off to do laundry and dishes before I have to S from Gan.
Have a good day!
As for the study group I am learning hebrew with a friend from the neighborhood. Today we mostly spent visiting and playing with the twins, but we went through our collective materials and went over some vocabulary relating to banking. Very useful. Tomorrow we will be focusing more on the hebrew and will be going over the banking end of things.
I am off to do laundry and dishes before I have to S from Gan.
Have a good day!
Sunday, September 17, 2006
To the New Year
On Friday night we celebrate the Jewish New Year. It is a time of reflection, not only because it is a major religious holiday, but because it marks another passage of time. As the new year arrives I reflect on where I was a year ago both in my religious observance and in my personal life. A year ago I did not realize I was pregnant, even though I was. We had, had some friends of my husband's out for shabbat. It was a big party as my husband was switching from a Yeshiva to a Kollel and his friends threw a party for him to celebrate. All was well until motzei shabbat and I felt horrible all of a sudden. Soon after the whole family was sick. It took me about 2 weeks to realize I did not have what everyone else did! Last year we had a family of 3, now we have 5! With children, each new year is really a marker. I think back to when I was pregnant with our first child, then to the first year with a child, etc. It is exciting to see our oldest grow and enjoy the holidays more with each passing year as he begins to understand bits and pieces. Now we will have a new experience with the twins this year!
I think not only has this past year been a year in which our family has grown, but I feel that spiritualy I have accomplished a lot. I feel I have put more trust and faith in Hashem this year than in years past. It is freeing, because at some point I realized that once I have done what I can, it is no longer up to me. I can relax, instead of saying, "what if...." I now realize that all things happen for a reason and "what if..." didn't happen because it wasn't meant too. Although I know that some people in my life feel that my becoming religious has limited my life, I actually feel that it has broadend my life. There are many things I never would have experienced if I had remained in my former habits. Although there are things I miss, I still find a way to keep the important things close to me and fill in the holes with new things.
And speaking of new things...on to a different topic. S is into his third week of Gan and he is still having trouble adjusting. However, I feel more confident now that I am on the right track. I had a good conversation with his Gannenet from last year and she said that although he is one of the youngest, he should do fine. She agreed that it was a hard to call whether to send a child his age up to the next level or hold him back, but felt confident he would do OK in the end. The cut off is Channukah, his birthday is just two weeks before that cut off. So he really is one of the youngest, in the class. In fact I am not so sure who is under him except for one other boy who b-day is the day after his. I have decided that I will keep him in until the end of Dec. and if he still hates it I will pull him out and put him back in private Gan for another year. This gives us time to see where the problem is and how to help him adjust with reasonable time for re-evaluation.
On a side note, the twins are wonderful and getting bigger every day! They will be 4 months on Friday and it is hard to believe. Y is such a rollypolly and loves to smile and coo! He has such an innocence about him. M is long and lean and she likes to talk. She seems to have a more wisened air about her, much like S did when he was born. It is interesting with M I have noticed to birthmarks, one she has had literally since birth and it is a mark of three little indents on her chest, like someone poked her with a fork. The other just developed and it is a beige mark on her stomach. Someone told me that scars from past lives can show up on the new body. Although in Judaism there is a deep belief in past lives, I am not sure I believe that aspect, but it does make wonder just where she has been in the past. Would make for a great piece of fiction perhaps.
OK it is late here and I am missing out on sleep to post this blog.
Have a sweet and wonderful New Year.
Shana Tova!
I think not only has this past year been a year in which our family has grown, but I feel that spiritualy I have accomplished a lot. I feel I have put more trust and faith in Hashem this year than in years past. It is freeing, because at some point I realized that once I have done what I can, it is no longer up to me. I can relax, instead of saying, "what if...." I now realize that all things happen for a reason and "what if..." didn't happen because it wasn't meant too. Although I know that some people in my life feel that my becoming religious has limited my life, I actually feel that it has broadend my life. There are many things I never would have experienced if I had remained in my former habits. Although there are things I miss, I still find a way to keep the important things close to me and fill in the holes with new things.
And speaking of new things...on to a different topic. S is into his third week of Gan and he is still having trouble adjusting. However, I feel more confident now that I am on the right track. I had a good conversation with his Gannenet from last year and she said that although he is one of the youngest, he should do fine. She agreed that it was a hard to call whether to send a child his age up to the next level or hold him back, but felt confident he would do OK in the end. The cut off is Channukah, his birthday is just two weeks before that cut off. So he really is one of the youngest, in the class. In fact I am not so sure who is under him except for one other boy who b-day is the day after his. I have decided that I will keep him in until the end of Dec. and if he still hates it I will pull him out and put him back in private Gan for another year. This gives us time to see where the problem is and how to help him adjust with reasonable time for re-evaluation.
On a side note, the twins are wonderful and getting bigger every day! They will be 4 months on Friday and it is hard to believe. Y is such a rollypolly and loves to smile and coo! He has such an innocence about him. M is long and lean and she likes to talk. She seems to have a more wisened air about her, much like S did when he was born. It is interesting with M I have noticed to birthmarks, one she has had literally since birth and it is a mark of three little indents on her chest, like someone poked her with a fork. The other just developed and it is a beige mark on her stomach. Someone told me that scars from past lives can show up on the new body. Although in Judaism there is a deep belief in past lives, I am not sure I believe that aspect, but it does make wonder just where she has been in the past. Would make for a great piece of fiction perhaps.
OK it is late here and I am missing out on sleep to post this blog.
Have a sweet and wonderful New Year.
Shana Tova!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Well it has finally happened! It is 2:30 in the afternoon, my kids are all sleeping and I am awake! So I am taking this time to blog instead of do laundry and the like. What fun is that?
Most of my thoughts are focused on the life and times of my 2+ year old son. He seems to be updating the latest addition on the book, "How to be a Two Year Old and Getting the Most of the Terrible Two's!" This isn't a book, but it should be. And it should be written by my little man. To give him credit, being two is not easy. I read that two year olds have quick mood swings and that is normal. I think it must be because, they are not babies, but they are not really big enough to do much on their own. Plus they are learning all kinds of new things like potty training and how to clean up after themselves in a basic way. To add insult to injury, Shmuely is also learning how to share mommy after almost 2 years straight of one-on-one attention. Although he does love Y&M it is a bit rough on him. And now for the clincher, this week we started Gan. Last year he went to Gan, but it was only a couple of days a week, a smaller class and the teacher spoke english. Now we have 30 kids, 6 days a week and it is all hebrew. Except one Gannenet does speak english. Whew! What a relief for mommy. On the one hand, I feel bad sending him to Gan, it is not mandatory(though I don't one person who doesn't do it) and I am not working so it is not like I have to send him. On the other, what on earth is he going to do at home all day with me, while I take of Y&M? I don't want him spending the rest of his life in a commatose state watching movies and I just can't spend the one-on-one time like I want to. They also teach them a lot of things. First, he is learning hebrew, he should pass me by next week! (Just kidding, he still speaks a lot of 2 year old as well.) They also teach them songs, reinforce religious education and basics like, colors, numbers, etc. Finally, he is learning social skills. All of things are important and I feel like although it is difficult for him to adjust, he needs to learn to try new things and that all things are difficult in the begining, but once you get used to them it is OK. Plus the Ganennet assures me that he has fun there when I am not looking. I know part of my anxiety comes from my maternal instincts to protect my children from anything uncomfortable or unpleasant, but if I did that he would never try anything new and he would miss out on a lot of life's lessons'. I have decided that raising kids is a lot like a video game, each age is a level and you work and scramble to get everything out of it you can before you reach the next level so that you are prepared for the next set of obstacles, but the truth is you are not prepared because you have never seen that level before and so you take your goodies and do the best you can. Fortunately I get a lot of support from my family and from the neighborhood. My neighbors have 8 kids on one side and 7 on the other, the average in the community is 5. It is good to have lots of people to get advice from.
OK the troops are waking up and they are restless so I guess I will wrap up. But before I go, I just have to say, some things here are so great! I just got my groceries delivered to my door. Even if I had a car it is great not having to shlep kids and groceries up 14 steps. And the great thing is if you spend over $30(150 shekel) it is free. It varies from store to store, but that is the deal here and such a deal it is!
Alright, gotta run,
Alina
Most of my thoughts are focused on the life and times of my 2+ year old son. He seems to be updating the latest addition on the book, "How to be a Two Year Old and Getting the Most of the Terrible Two's!" This isn't a book, but it should be. And it should be written by my little man. To give him credit, being two is not easy. I read that two year olds have quick mood swings and that is normal. I think it must be because, they are not babies, but they are not really big enough to do much on their own. Plus they are learning all kinds of new things like potty training and how to clean up after themselves in a basic way. To add insult to injury, Shmuely is also learning how to share mommy after almost 2 years straight of one-on-one attention. Although he does love Y&M it is a bit rough on him. And now for the clincher, this week we started Gan. Last year he went to Gan, but it was only a couple of days a week, a smaller class and the teacher spoke english. Now we have 30 kids, 6 days a week and it is all hebrew. Except one Gannenet does speak english. Whew! What a relief for mommy. On the one hand, I feel bad sending him to Gan, it is not mandatory(though I don't one person who doesn't do it) and I am not working so it is not like I have to send him. On the other, what on earth is he going to do at home all day with me, while I take of Y&M? I don't want him spending the rest of his life in a commatose state watching movies and I just can't spend the one-on-one time like I want to. They also teach them a lot of things. First, he is learning hebrew, he should pass me by next week! (Just kidding, he still speaks a lot of 2 year old as well.) They also teach them songs, reinforce religious education and basics like, colors, numbers, etc. Finally, he is learning social skills. All of things are important and I feel like although it is difficult for him to adjust, he needs to learn to try new things and that all things are difficult in the begining, but once you get used to them it is OK. Plus the Ganennet assures me that he has fun there when I am not looking. I know part of my anxiety comes from my maternal instincts to protect my children from anything uncomfortable or unpleasant, but if I did that he would never try anything new and he would miss out on a lot of life's lessons'. I have decided that raising kids is a lot like a video game, each age is a level and you work and scramble to get everything out of it you can before you reach the next level so that you are prepared for the next set of obstacles, but the truth is you are not prepared because you have never seen that level before and so you take your goodies and do the best you can. Fortunately I get a lot of support from my family and from the neighborhood. My neighbors have 8 kids on one side and 7 on the other, the average in the community is 5. It is good to have lots of people to get advice from.
OK the troops are waking up and they are restless so I guess I will wrap up. But before I go, I just have to say, some things here are so great! I just got my groceries delivered to my door. Even if I had a car it is great not having to shlep kids and groceries up 14 steps. And the great thing is if you spend over $30(150 shekel) it is free. It varies from store to store, but that is the deal here and such a deal it is!
Alright, gotta run,
Alina
Friday, August 18, 2006
It is 2:00am and I am up because I fell asleep in my chair nursing the twins. Instead of going straight to bed like a normal person I like to use this time to myself for a few moments. I am up already....... and I am almost guaranteed not to be interupted.
First, I am pleased to announce that after almost 3 months of pestering the government we did get our Bituach Leumi! Hurray! This is our baby money. Our doctor is also very happy because it means he gets a sizeable down payment for his services now. In Israel every person is required to have health insurance. Because we are on a Socialized Medical system it is pretty cheap. Until you stray.....If we had gone through with the C-Section and been in the hospital the whole thing would have been paid for through insurance. Instead we opted to go with a private doctor and have the twins at home. This means it all came out of pocket at a high price. But, the health advantages were well worth the cost. In some circumstances a C-Section is necessary, in my circumstance we did not agree. We have had all 3 kids at home and it is always worth it. I like being in my own bed, eating my own food and having my privacy. The other advantage was that I was not away from my oldest son. We have never been apart for more than 24 hours and 5 days apart would have turned him upside down. It is a bit of a bummer to see all this money come in and know that had we gone traditional we would be ahead now instead of just floating, but in the end it is worth it. And considering most people who do home birth never get the Bituach Leumi, I am not complaining.
I would also like to thank everyone for their encouragement on keeping up this blog. I am not sure what I have to say is interesting to anyone else, so I am glad some people are enjoying it. I guess that is the great thing about free will, if someone finds it boring, they don't have to read it. And I am not even spamming their inbox!
Today was a big day, I actually took all three kids to play at a friend's house to play. It was either that or S and I were going to go nuts! This may not seem like a big deal to someone with one kid, but gathering up 2 non-walkers and a 2 year old is work. Getting diapers, everyone dressed, fed and down the stairs, yes, as usual we live in an upstairs apt. But I don't mind, it tends to prevent most of the creepy crawlies from getting in! Anyhow, doing all of this is a lot of work, so I was very happy to be out today. It was a hot walk, but worth it and nice for S to do something besides hang at home and watch movies.
I have found that having twins now has made me compromise a lot on my idea of ideal child raising. The moment I got pregnant, so many things went out the window I lost count. First as a family we spent so much time being sick this winter that we were all miserable, then being pregnant on top did not help. So....out came the videos, then dinner started resemble lunch a lot. Hard boiled eggs, toast and juice is a complete breakfast, right?!......And so it goes. I don't really like the fact that S has learned to appreciate the fine art of parking his tush to watch more than one movie a day, but I keep promising myself, it is just for a little while. 'Till mommy can manage all three kids at once....Oh in about 18 years! Just kidding. This fall S will be back in Gan (pre-school) and that will keep him busy from 8-1:30p, home for lunch, a nap if I am lucky, some play dates and dinner and bed. So there should not be some much need for a movie. Although in the winter when it is pouring buckets, there is not much else to do. Although I am hoping to get him into Piano lessons or start teaching him myself. This will also fill in sometime.
OK I must be boring everyone and this is getting long because it is 3:00am now and my thoughts are all over the place.
May everyone have a peaceful and quiet night/day where ever you are and pray for the continued peace and safety of Israel.
First, I am pleased to announce that after almost 3 months of pestering the government we did get our Bituach Leumi! Hurray! This is our baby money. Our doctor is also very happy because it means he gets a sizeable down payment for his services now. In Israel every person is required to have health insurance. Because we are on a Socialized Medical system it is pretty cheap. Until you stray.....If we had gone through with the C-Section and been in the hospital the whole thing would have been paid for through insurance. Instead we opted to go with a private doctor and have the twins at home. This means it all came out of pocket at a high price. But, the health advantages were well worth the cost. In some circumstances a C-Section is necessary, in my circumstance we did not agree. We have had all 3 kids at home and it is always worth it. I like being in my own bed, eating my own food and having my privacy. The other advantage was that I was not away from my oldest son. We have never been apart for more than 24 hours and 5 days apart would have turned him upside down. It is a bit of a bummer to see all this money come in and know that had we gone traditional we would be ahead now instead of just floating, but in the end it is worth it. And considering most people who do home birth never get the Bituach Leumi, I am not complaining.
I would also like to thank everyone for their encouragement on keeping up this blog. I am not sure what I have to say is interesting to anyone else, so I am glad some people are enjoying it. I guess that is the great thing about free will, if someone finds it boring, they don't have to read it. And I am not even spamming their inbox!
Today was a big day, I actually took all three kids to play at a friend's house to play. It was either that or S and I were going to go nuts! This may not seem like a big deal to someone with one kid, but gathering up 2 non-walkers and a 2 year old is work. Getting diapers, everyone dressed, fed and down the stairs, yes, as usual we live in an upstairs apt. But I don't mind, it tends to prevent most of the creepy crawlies from getting in! Anyhow, doing all of this is a lot of work, so I was very happy to be out today. It was a hot walk, but worth it and nice for S to do something besides hang at home and watch movies.
I have found that having twins now has made me compromise a lot on my idea of ideal child raising. The moment I got pregnant, so many things went out the window I lost count. First as a family we spent so much time being sick this winter that we were all miserable, then being pregnant on top did not help. So....out came the videos, then dinner started resemble lunch a lot. Hard boiled eggs, toast and juice is a complete breakfast, right?!......And so it goes. I don't really like the fact that S has learned to appreciate the fine art of parking his tush to watch more than one movie a day, but I keep promising myself, it is just for a little while. 'Till mommy can manage all three kids at once....Oh in about 18 years! Just kidding. This fall S will be back in Gan (pre-school) and that will keep him busy from 8-1:30p, home for lunch, a nap if I am lucky, some play dates and dinner and bed. So there should not be some much need for a movie. Although in the winter when it is pouring buckets, there is not much else to do. Although I am hoping to get him into Piano lessons or start teaching him myself. This will also fill in sometime.
OK I must be boring everyone and this is getting long because it is 3:00am now and my thoughts are all over the place.
May everyone have a peaceful and quiet night/day where ever you are and pray for the continued peace and safety of Israel.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
OK I am really trying to make an effort to keep up on this blog; so instead of doing dishes and laundry.....I am updating my blog. Right now I have a twin sleeping, one on the couch and the oldest is watching The Simpons with his abba(father).
The war is officialy over and our friends C&N went home today. Of course there is a lot of mixed feeling on this. I am glad that war is over so that everyone can quit worrying about us, but as with most of Israel, I feel that what we needed to do, did not get done. Our soldiers were not released and most of us still feel a real threat from Hizbollah. It is also a worry to have the U.N. offering to put troops on the border considering U.N. is comprised of some very vocal arab countries who would like us gone and by European countries who feel Hitler should have finished the job. Not very reassuring! France offered up troops, but the anti-semitisim in France is heating so a very scary prospect. And of course now they say it will take a year to get troops in place.....Hmmmm...I feel like they are ready to help don't you?
Life on the home front is pretty quiet as usual. Well how exciting can things be when we have to shlep 3 kids every where we go! We tend to spend a lot of time at home. Since we have no car getting off the Yeshuv is a lot of work. However, we did go to Bituach Leumi today. This is a government branch that handles child stipends. One of the great things about Israel is that they actually give you money for having kids. One kid is not that much, 2 kids is not much more, but having twins really changes things. They give you a monthly stipend and a lump sum just for having them. So for the past 2mo. they have been promising our stipend, but to no avail. Now they say we will have it tomorrow. Sure hope so! And so goes a typical day in government beuracracy! Just so you know, I think government beuracracy in the states is just as nutty and un-reliable! Any way, so that was our big outing today.
We are still waging the potty training war and we are slowly winning, I think. Can anyone really be sure with a 2 &1/2 year old? Any potty training suggestions for little boys is welcome! We are open to any and all suggestions. Today I gave him raisins to eat while he was on the potty. That got him to sit.
I had a really rewarding moment as a parent the other day though. S (my 2&1/2 yr. old) sat on my lap and sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and the ABC song with me. It was really cute.
The Twins are cute as ever and growing fast. I love to see them laugh and smile. Y (my boy) really likes to laugh and giggle. M (my girl) is deffinitely all girl.
OK the natives are restless and house work is calling. We are going to put in The Bear in the Big Blue House Potty Training Video. Ahhh the thrill of parenting. My TV viewing has changed drastically.
Have a good day/evening where ever you are!
The war is officialy over and our friends C&N went home today. Of course there is a lot of mixed feeling on this. I am glad that war is over so that everyone can quit worrying about us, but as with most of Israel, I feel that what we needed to do, did not get done. Our soldiers were not released and most of us still feel a real threat from Hizbollah. It is also a worry to have the U.N. offering to put troops on the border considering U.N. is comprised of some very vocal arab countries who would like us gone and by European countries who feel Hitler should have finished the job. Not very reassuring! France offered up troops, but the anti-semitisim in France is heating so a very scary prospect. And of course now they say it will take a year to get troops in place.....Hmmmm...I feel like they are ready to help don't you?
Life on the home front is pretty quiet as usual. Well how exciting can things be when we have to shlep 3 kids every where we go! We tend to spend a lot of time at home. Since we have no car getting off the Yeshuv is a lot of work. However, we did go to Bituach Leumi today. This is a government branch that handles child stipends. One of the great things about Israel is that they actually give you money for having kids. One kid is not that much, 2 kids is not much more, but having twins really changes things. They give you a monthly stipend and a lump sum just for having them. So for the past 2mo. they have been promising our stipend, but to no avail. Now they say we will have it tomorrow. Sure hope so! And so goes a typical day in government beuracracy! Just so you know, I think government beuracracy in the states is just as nutty and un-reliable! Any way, so that was our big outing today.
We are still waging the potty training war and we are slowly winning, I think. Can anyone really be sure with a 2 &1/2 year old? Any potty training suggestions for little boys is welcome! We are open to any and all suggestions. Today I gave him raisins to eat while he was on the potty. That got him to sit.
I had a really rewarding moment as a parent the other day though. S (my 2&1/2 yr. old) sat on my lap and sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and the ABC song with me. It was really cute.
The Twins are cute as ever and growing fast. I love to see them laugh and smile. Y (my boy) really likes to laugh and giggle. M (my girl) is deffinitely all girl.
OK the natives are restless and house work is calling. We are going to put in The Bear in the Big Blue House Potty Training Video. Ahhh the thrill of parenting. My TV viewing has changed drastically.
Have a good day/evening where ever you are!
Sunday, August 13, 2006
The time between posts seems to be getting longer and longer but this is what happens with 3 kids in the house under age 3. On May 22nd we had 2 healthy twins born at home. Yoseph Eitan and Malka Haddasah. We opted for home delivery when the Dr. wanted to do a C-section because they were breach. So we found a specialist who would deliver at home.
A lot has been going on in the past 2&1/2 mo. both at home and in our country. There is a war going on now and it is a bit surreal. We have friends C & N from Tzsfat who have been out of their house for 5 weeks now. We were able to find them an apt. here to stay in. This is a real blessing because they have their own place. Many people are in hotels or staying with families with 9 people and one bathroom. Others are staying in Yeshivha Dorms at 100 shekels a night. That is about 20 dollars a day! It was great to have C & N here because they had their baby in our house! This was also a planned home delivery and we offered our house because we have had all our kids at home. The community has been a huge help and was great with the Brit. In our community over all it has been volunteer central. People supply food, games, toys, etc. for those displaced. I know we are doing our effort by having our friends almost every shabbat and hosting them for about 2 weeks before they found their place. But I wish I could do more. I want to take the kids up and go visit the families staying in the dorms here. It is odd seeing what is going on up North because physicaly as far as resources, etc. we are unaffected. We are in our homes, no sirens or bombs, no lack of food, phones, etc. What makes it real is the fact that many families are here from the North and the fact that we have many men and boys off fighting the war. One family lost their son in battle over shabbat.
But on to other wars. I must sign off to go battle my 2 & 1/2 year old who thinks it is great fun to slam into me while I am typing. And Malki is crying now and it is off to battle another day!
A lot has been going on in the past 2&1/2 mo. both at home and in our country. There is a war going on now and it is a bit surreal. We have friends C & N from Tzsfat who have been out of their house for 5 weeks now. We were able to find them an apt. here to stay in. This is a real blessing because they have their own place. Many people are in hotels or staying with families with 9 people and one bathroom. Others are staying in Yeshivha Dorms at 100 shekels a night. That is about 20 dollars a day! It was great to have C & N here because they had their baby in our house! This was also a planned home delivery and we offered our house because we have had all our kids at home. The community has been a huge help and was great with the Brit. In our community over all it has been volunteer central. People supply food, games, toys, etc. for those displaced. I know we are doing our effort by having our friends almost every shabbat and hosting them for about 2 weeks before they found their place. But I wish I could do more. I want to take the kids up and go visit the families staying in the dorms here. It is odd seeing what is going on up North because physicaly as far as resources, etc. we are unaffected. We are in our homes, no sirens or bombs, no lack of food, phones, etc. What makes it real is the fact that many families are here from the North and the fact that we have many men and boys off fighting the war. One family lost their son in battle over shabbat.
But on to other wars. I must sign off to go battle my 2 & 1/2 year old who thinks it is great fun to slam into me while I am typing. And Malki is crying now and it is off to battle another day!
Monday, January 30, 2006
It has been months since I posted a blog. But so much has happened since then. After the High Holidays my in-laws arrived for a short but very pleasant visit. I was thrilled to see how much they enjoyed Israel. We did not do the usual touristing, except one day in Jerusalem. What we did was spend time on our Yeshuv and then enjoyed just seeing our day to day life, where we live, meeting our son's gannenet,etc. After that we had a friend from the states stay with us for a about a week and a half also enjoyable. It has been exciting being able to show everyone where we live and what it is like. Now it is the end of January and my parents arrive today at 4pm and I am a nervous wreck. Why I don't know but I am. In fact I should be getting ready for them instead of blogging. But I am directing my nervous energy into less productive things instead.
What has really kept us busy though is the fact that G-d willing, we will be expecting twins in June! This was quite a shock as it is does not really run on either side of the family except some where vaguely way down the line. Working in the Israeli medical system is very confusing for a new olim, but we are grateful to be on a socialist medical system because the insurance and bills are much cheaper. Thank G-d. I am fortunate as I have one doctor who takes care of everything because I am considered high risk. However, on a standard pregnancy the doctor is involved very little and most of the month to month stuff is taken care of at the Tipat Chalav, basically a medical clinic who just runs the basic tests to be sure all is well. The doctor ususally involved just for ultrasounds and any problems that arise. I am grateful for the twins because it seems scary to me. But what is really hard is the fact that my doctor will not deliver my baby. When I arrive at the hospital 2 midwives will handle the delivery with a doctor on hand G-d forbid there are problems. Everyone assures us this is fine and works well, but it seems a little nerve wracking to me. I guess we will just have to trust in Hashem and the Israeli system.
The other thing weighing on us as of late is of course the political arena. It is truly never a dull moment here. Unfortunately this will have to wait for another day as I am out of time and have to finish getting the house ready before my parents arrive.
Have a good week!
What has really kept us busy though is the fact that G-d willing, we will be expecting twins in June! This was quite a shock as it is does not really run on either side of the family except some where vaguely way down the line. Working in the Israeli medical system is very confusing for a new olim, but we are grateful to be on a socialist medical system because the insurance and bills are much cheaper. Thank G-d. I am fortunate as I have one doctor who takes care of everything because I am considered high risk. However, on a standard pregnancy the doctor is involved very little and most of the month to month stuff is taken care of at the Tipat Chalav, basically a medical clinic who just runs the basic tests to be sure all is well. The doctor ususally involved just for ultrasounds and any problems that arise. I am grateful for the twins because it seems scary to me. But what is really hard is the fact that my doctor will not deliver my baby. When I arrive at the hospital 2 midwives will handle the delivery with a doctor on hand G-d forbid there are problems. Everyone assures us this is fine and works well, but it seems a little nerve wracking to me. I guess we will just have to trust in Hashem and the Israeli system.
The other thing weighing on us as of late is of course the political arena. It is truly never a dull moment here. Unfortunately this will have to wait for another day as I am out of time and have to finish getting the house ready before my parents arrive.
Have a good week!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)