Herding Cats

This is what D uses to describe our kids. This exactly sums up what it is like to take our kids out anywhere. Usually our biggest outing is to a park these days. Currently the park is across the street from our house and getting to and from is a project as all three kids have their own agenda when heading out. S is all over the place sometimes leading the pack or sometimes digressing to their antics or leading them astray. Y wants to stop and look at every car on the street, thankfully there are not that many and M looks at everything and goes everywhere......She takes after S. This is the short version. They all feel a need to go up all the stairs we pass, inspect any utility doors left open and anything else they can find. This park is literally two minutes from the house, but I think it takes us anywhere from 10-30min. each way! So now that you have all this information you will understand when I say, I have no idea what possesed me to take all three kids to Jerusalem's largest mall today by myself during one of the busiest times of the year.

This is the week of Pesach(Passover) we have Passover Sedar first night and then there is an interim week and then we celebrate the final night and rejoice that the next day we will all be eating carbs again! I mean we all rejoice that we are free and no longer slaves in Egypt. So in between while we are forgoing bread and all things that involve flour, almost the entire country is on vacation. About the only people who are working are those in the service industry. Now on top of all this we are in the middle of a heat wave. So you tell me where you think everyone is going. Yup, the mall. Malka Mall is an American style mall, size and all, so for those of you who have kids you know what the potential is for losing said kid in the mall. Now stupid me, here I go with three kids and no stroller. Our stroller died and we are waiting for Grammy and Grandpa to bring us a new one, G-d Bless them! We have been like this for a while and it makes life a challenge. BUT I did have a reason for going. The kids needed new shoes. This was not a gee maybe it is time get Larry, Mo and Curly shoes, this was, Larry's toes are sticking out literally of the old ones and Mo needs to be in something not her brothers hand me downs and fortunately, we can put Curly off for another month.

When I have visions of taking the kids out, I envision ths scenario where they want to walk and cooperate and we will look like everyone else at the mall and no one runs off and everone listens. If only that were true......The easiest part of this was getting on and off the bus. From the get go the only one willing to walk is S, Mr. and Mrs. busy are too tired. And they have to stop and look at everything. And now we are in major traffic so Y just wants to sit and watch all the cars. I almost stopped right there and gave up on the shoe quest. But this was the only day to do this and S really needed shoes before he goes back to school from vacation and everything in our yeshuv is closed this week. So after some help from a very nice woman we make it in. Time for lunch. We hit the grocery store, all malls in Israel have one. It is pretty cool. We get OJ cottage cheese and potato chips, not the best, but not the worst. We did not do fruit because of a whole lot of kosher issues which I will not go into. So we finally get through the store after searching for only Kosher for Passover food and getting through the loads of people who are buying last minute stuff for barbecues, we find a spot to sit. I won't even go into lunch, but suffice to say it is its own project and although it can be annoying, I am grateful that this Israeli woman made it her business to give me a hand. Then it is off to the shoe store, where everything is on sale, but doesnt apply to us. Oh boy! After what seems like an eternity I get two of three kids shoes. Like I said we put off Curly (Y) because he could make do with his. As it is for two pairs of shoes I had to drop about the equivalent of $100 U.S.! Gack! We usually we skip the name brand stores and head for the outlets, but getting to the mall was about all I could manage today. So we get ready to leave and S is gone. In his new shoes of course. So we use the box and I pay for them. But he is no where to be found. At this point I felt like calling D and asking how he felt about just scaling ourselves back to two kids. Think of the money we could save! Meanwhile I am still trying to drag, carry, nudge, the other two to walk and preferably in the direction I need to go. After making rounds in nearby stores I find him with two women. He was at the other end of the mall.....looking for me........So of course I say thank you and tell him, if he had not left he would not need to look for me. And we have discussion 9 million about not wandering off as Y wanders off and is captured by the same two women who by now are probably ready to call Child Services and report me as an incompetent parent. Time to go home. Back down two floors and out the door. By this time I am pretty much carrying both kids on and off, mostly on until we get to the bus. Then we get everyone home, M is asleep and the other two are almost there. But do you think everyone could stick with the program? Nope. The minute we are all off the bus I am missing Y. He stopped to look at the 16 passenger van and blended in with tire it was so big! The whole thing probably took us about 5 hours and I still had to whip up a quick dinner! I told D the next time I want to spend that much money for that much aggravation I will flush the money down the toilet and beat my head against the wall. Or I could do what D suggested which is to take them out one at a time and leave the other two home with him.